Do you ever get into a brief conversation where you finally figure out what you're going to say next but then....you never end up saying anything? You end up simply listening, nodding your head and agreeing with the other person who's leading the conversation.
It can be annoying.
Maybe the thing you have to say is something about yourself, but you hesitate because you don't know how to share it and don't wanna come across as arrogant or self-absorbed.
Today I want to share a technique that you can use to build rapport with others by opening up about yourself in a genuine way.
The "Yes and Technique"
A natural and easy way to sprinkle in things about yourself is by using the “Yes and Technique" when someone asks you a question.
- The "yes" part simply answers the question. In some cases it may be "no" (depending on the question)
- The "and" part goes into a bit of depth and turns your answer into more of a story
Here are two examples:
Katrina: Do you enjoy red wine?
You: Yes I am [Yes]. And [and...] I actually just went to Napa Valley this summer because I love wine and the winemaking process so much. It was beautiful there, rolling hills, huge estates we had a blast. Are you a red wine fan?
Katrina: Yes, I absolutely love red wine [Yes]. In fact, [and…] most of my Fridays at work are spent dreaming about the bottle I'm going to open that night (Ok, I’d never say that. But it’s true!)
See how both examples turned a “yes or no” question into something way more fascinating by adding a few details?
Using this strategy will make you more memorable.
Because people don't remember if you happened to stumble through a few words or stuttered a bit...what they remember are stories.
By adding a short story you become way more memorable. So use this strategy during your next conversation to build rapport and charisma (or if you're sick of listening to someone talk the whole time).
Stay tuned, in the next post I'll share a conversation strategy to make talking to you feel as good as having sex....seriously. Oh and it will also keep the convo flowing 🙂
For now, go take action and apply this strategy. When you're done, share your results in the comments below!